Rector Review: Going back again - The babies' first birthday!!

Ok, I simply cannot believe that I didn't blog about this at the time. As I was going back to look at pictures for this post, I was shocked at how little they looked. Well, here I go.

Their birthday invitation read:

Bottles prepared: 4,500
Diapers changed: 6,120
Snuggles and laughs: Who's counting?

Those numbers were real, or as close to real as I could get. I went back and thought about their first year in 3 month increments and came up with averages per day and per week. I should have put:

Months that Mommy cried: 4.
Months that Ellie was on ignore: 6
Months before daddy got to sleep through the night: 8
Months before mommy got to sleep through the night: 10
Spit up stains on the carpet: 1 Million
Average number of meals that mommy ate per day (and still sometimes eats) 1.5

It wasn't all bad and as anyone with multiples will tell you, if you can get through that first year, you'll be ok. It was hard through. We depended heavily on family and friends to help us out those first few months. My sister, with her bald head, somehow managed to find the time and energy to help me whenever she could. My mom helped out twice a week. My neighbors helped out daily. I had friends, moms of friends and even friends of friends help me. I had two different sets of friends organize meals for us. We had meals brought to us about 2-3 times a week for probably the first 2.5-3 months. Honestly, without those meals, we either wouldn't have eaten, or we would have lived on cereal. There simply was not time to prepare meals, and there certainly was not time to go to the grocery store. Do you have any idea how hard it was for me to go to the store with a 3 year old and two babies in infant seats? Hard, and limited! There is only so much you can get into the bottom cart of a double stroller!

I cried a lot that first summer. Yes, I was very hormonal. But also I was just so tired and so was Mike. We couldn't even give each other a break because it was so hard to feed them both that we both got up, every night, every 3 hours. The babies both had pretty bad reflux so we had to feed them a very small amount at time, burp them, feed them, burp them, feed them and then keep them upright for 30-45 minutes afterward. The whole process took about an hour, not including preparing bottles, changing them and usually changing someone's clothes because it was covered in spit up. It was a nightmare. Ellie gets up very early and I can't tell you how many times we got up at 4:30 or 5:00 to feed and then had to go directly to dealing with Ellie because she was awake by 6:00.

I had enormous guilt about Ellie. She went from being the center of our universe to falling off the back burner and behind the stove in one fell swoop. That poor kid. She would literally spend every day from about 6:30am until about 1:00 or 2:00pm completely on her own - and then I'd try to put her down for a nap. Oh, I was there but I flat out didn't have time for her. She got way more screen time than any three year old should ever have. People tired so hard to help out by taking her somewhere or inviting her over for a playdate, but as it turned out, that was the last thing she wanted. She missed Daddy and I so much she just wanted to be with us, even if it meant just being in the same room with me as I fed the babies and she watched TV or played on the computer. It was heart breaking. She and I often sat with each other feeding babies (yes, she helped!) and cried while we were doing it. Nice bonding time. Ugh.

I had big guilt about my inability to nurse the babies as well. This one really killed me. I happily nursed Ellie for 8 months and of course she was never sick, never had ear infections, etc. I realized very quickly, I mean VERY quickly (as in just hours after the babies were born) that nursing two babies at once was near impossible for me. I know people do it and good for them but I couldn't do it. They were so little and their milk source was, well, so big, they just couldn't do it either. My milk supply was uneven so someone was always missing out. Plus, they would fall asleep! Usually such a sweet thing but they were so little and NEEDED to eat a certain amount every couple of hours so they would even let us bring them home. I resorted to pumping well before I even left the hospital but even that was just a supplement to the formula that the doctors insisted they have (I didn't fight that - they needed to eat). I pumped for 9 weeks and finally gave up as it got to the point that I didn't even have time to do that. More crying. Of course, just to dig it in, they were sick from the day Ellie started preschool to about their first birthday, complete with constant ear infections. Poor babies!

My sister was going though chemotherapy that summer and I couldn't ever help her, yet she somehow managed to help me. More guilt, more crying. Told you I cried a lot that first summer!

All of that being said, we made it. I had them on a regular two nap schedule, a 7:00pm bedtime and a once a night wake up call by the time they were about 6 months old. Ellie was settling into her first year of preschool and she no longer thought I was just trying to get rid of her. Mike and I started to get more sleep - life was getting better.

By 8 months Rachael started sleeping through the night and Jillian was growing out of her reflux. We separated them at night by this point thinking we'd reunite them after they both started sleeping through the night. Never happened. We are just now painting our guest room and converting it to Rachael's permanent room - despite the fact that she has been sleeping there now for almost a year!

By 10 months Jillian was sleeping through the night and Rachael was growing out of her reflux. I think we finally had our carpets cleaned right around 12 months - since we were finally past the major stain assault that baby spit brings!

By 12 months neither of them was walking but boy were they cute!! We only ("only") have twins but to this day, we attract attention when we go out. I've become used to it and have learned just how many other people have multiples!

We kind of had two parties for them. One celebration with the neighbors and one with close friends and family. Rachael did well the first time, Jillian did well the second time. Mommy and daddy did well both times - although I couldn't help but choke up as I thanked everyone for their help over the last year!

Not a day goes by that Mike and I don't marvel over the fact that we have twins, and three girls. I mean every day we just look at each other and say "I can't believe we have two babies! I can't believe we have three girls!!". We now can't imagine having just one baby. I look back at when I did have just one baby and I laugh at myself because I thought it was so hard at the time! HA! I am the mom of twins. I survived that first year. It has helped me through other things - knowing that I've got way more strength than I ever think I do. As the mom of multiples, you get very creative in how you do things. I can't tell you how many different ways I came up with to feed them on my own - some more successful than others! Well....enjoy the pictures!